200+ Funny Birthday Messages For Best Friend

250+ Christmas Wishes And Messages

200+ Romantic Good Morning Messages For Him

• From now on, we’re only doing brunch. Bedtime is 9:30.”
• Let us get to reality. It gets older but never better! Wishing you a good birthday! Did I remind you? You are an exception, though.
• I’ve always been able to trust you with all of my secrets, and now, even more so, because I’m not sure you’ll remember them!”
• Today, I give you permission to illuminate candles on your favorite cake – your birthday one. You don’t have to worry, I have already informed the fire service department in this area.
• I always knew we’d be friends till we were old and gray… but the gray part came a lot sooner than I expected.” ~Funny Birthday Messages For Best Friend~
• Congratulations on this one more year of survival through your math class. You got this!
• I’m so glad I found you all those years ago. Making friends at this age would suck.
• We all know that wisdom comes with age but then, I see no signs of aging in you at all. Happy birthday, dear best friend!
• The older I get, the more I dislike people. Glad you made the cut before it was too late!
• Do not worry about the number of candles. Your age is just described by your behavior and it is totally worth it.
• Please promise me you’ll never be one of those people our age who shocks me with how grown up they act.”
• If you’ve made it past the driving age, the drinking age, and the lowering of car insurance age — you might be wondering what you have left to look forward too. The answer is birthday greetings like this one.
• The good news: we’ve been friends for all these years. The bad news: it’s been a lot of years.
• Now, doing the math with the number of candles on your cake, you would be requiring the lungs of the legendary Hercules to blow all these candles by yourself. No, I did not mean you are old and fat! I meant I’m your best friend and I’d help you.
• Remember when we thought wine was so sophisticated? Now it’s the only thing people our age drink
• This day makes you feel like the one like you are chosen. Maybe you are..chosen..to stay away from the cake slices. I remember it is your birthday!
• From now on we should give our ages in Roman numerals. We’ll sound smart, and it will take people a while to figure out how old we are.
• Today is the day you realize you are old because your candles cost more than your cake.
• Like any good friend, I got you only the most practical gifts… prune juice, Depends, and a whole lot of alcohol. ~Funny Birthday Messages For Best Friend~
• I wish you take a real oath to do some exercise and wish you don’t walk up the stairs and call it exercise.
• What’s the age rule for dating? Half your age plus seven years? So for you that’s… never mind. If I say they’re too young, they’re too young.
• May your special day be sweet and spicy just like you, bestie!”
• Happy birthday to my best friend. May we grow to be the hottest cougars around!”
• You know everything about me and still decide to be my best friend… you are a deeply disturbed woman, you know that right? Happy birthday!”
• Happy birthday to the most beautiful woman I have seen until now. And that is only because today is your birthday and I don’t use mirrors.
• Actually, I wanted to get you something super special, super terrific, unique and beautiful for your birthday, but I don’t fit into the envelope.”
• You look different today. That could be your charm that increased, your weight that decreased and the hairstyle you recently change. But no! then, I realize – you have just become a year older.
• Count your blessings, not your wrinkles.”
• For your birthday, I tried thinking of words like superb, impressive, awesome, stunning, and gorgeous. But anyway, I know I do not cost anything to think. So I quit! Happy birthday, you!
• May your hair dye and mascara never run! Happy Birthday!”
• I would wish you for all of your dreams to come true! But then, it will be a tough shot on me to find out a wish for you next year. Since you are going to be certainly alive and healthy for another year, let me just say Happy Birthday!
• Cheers to a woman who stays young! (Only because she lies about her age.) Best wishes!”
• Your birthday is such a special occasion that I wish I could wrap myself up and give myself to you as a gift. ~Funny Birthday Messages For Best Friend~
• Best friends never need to be told they are best friends. So, I don’t need to tell you, right? Have a fantastic birthday, buddy!”
• Every one of your birthdays is a special once in a lifetime experience, but I always wake up the next day too drunk to remember them.
• It’s your birthday. Let’s do something stupid together.”
• Many happy returns! May you receive one extra year added to your life for every pound you gain.
• May God give you the appetite to enjoy your big day to the max, despite the fact that you are older and wrinklier today than you were yesterday.
• On the day you were born, if your mother had set you adrift in a basket to escape the wrath of pharaoh, it would have sunk from the excessive weight.
• For your birthday, I wanted to give you something that was both funny and charming, but then I remembered you already have me in your life.”
• You possess the qualities of a President – the looks of George Bush, the intelligence of Barack Obama and the disciple of Bill Clinton – so let me use the occasion of your birthday to wish that you make the most of out our your life!
• You see, you should not be ashamed of growing old, not only you get to play the smart guy all the time, but all antiques like you also have great value! Happy birthday old man!
• On your birthday, to ensure you have many more, I’ve gotten you a designated driver. Cheers!
• On your special day, I wish you peace, love, insight, relaxation, fun, knowledge, romance, friendship… and all that stuff that doesn’t cost anything.
• For your Big Day, they should just create a cake with a liquor bottle inside.
• Just imagine the things you’d want to hear on your birthday and assume I said them. Happy birthday!
• May you grow old and rich, so that you can leave me a big inheritance.
• Two tips for your birthday: 1. Forget the past, you can’t change it. 2. Forget the present, I didn’t get you one!
• I love you so much that if I had a job I would have bought you a gift.
• I’m so glad that we are growing older together and that you’ll always have a head start!
• May this gift serve as an eternal reminder of our friendship because it’ll probably be the last one I ever buy.
• We’ll be friends until we’re old and senile… and then we can be *new* friends!
• Happy birthday, my dear. May your bank account grow so fast that you get audited by the IRS.
• You’ve reached the age where your pregnancy would be labeled ‘geriatric.’ I think that’s just the universe telling you, don’t have kids. Stay wild and free with your BFF forever.
• Welcome to spinsterhood, girlfriend!
• On your special day, may you be blessed with the problems of the rich – such as where to park your yacht.
• May your body grow so old that people mistake you for a piece of wood. Birthday greetings, best friend!
• Remember when we watched ’13 Going on 30′ and thought 30 was so old?
• Happy birthday to my beloved friend. I couldn’t have asked the casting director of life to give me a better sidekick.
• May life compensate you like Floyd Mayweather for the many battles you have fought.
• I thought about moving out of your house as you continue to grow old, but by the looks of things, you probably need me now more than ever.
• If life were a sports league you would be MVP. Happy birthday and many more, dear friend.
• Girl, you are thirty, flirty, and… surviving.
• Buddy, even though you were born with no exceptional talent, marketable skill or extraordinary intelligence, I still believe that life has nothing but the best in store for you.
• Every day that I go to the gym, I use you as an inspiration – of what I would become if I let myself slack off. Best birthday wishes, best bud!

• You’ve always been the mom friend… but now you’re at the right age for the role!
• Happy birthday to one of my favorite guys! I hope your day is as awesome as you are. And yes, I know that sappy stuff makes you cringe. But we don’t always get what we want for our birthday, do we?
• You are such a special person that when you’re about to die I hope they freeze your brain so that it can be implanted in a robot a thousand years from now.
• May your birthday rock as hard as you did in marching band.” ~Funny Birthday Messages For Best Friend~
• As men, it’s not appropriate for us to shed tears when exchanging gifts on special occasions, but the one I’m giving you today cost me so much that I have to cry.
• Hey man, look on the bright side: you’re almost old enough to start dating someone half your age.
• We could use the occasion of your birthday to party our fat asses off like we always do. However, this year I want you to use this time to reflect on the finer things in life, and when I return from the club you can tell me all about them.
• Happy birthday to a dear friend who has never acted their age. Never change.
• As you grow older and wiser, may you also become senile and forget about the money I’m owing you.
• In the Victorian Age, we would be almost dead!
• Today would have been the perfect occasion to write sweet words about the greatest, most spectacular, uniquely exquisite friend in the world, but I already finished my autobiography a month ago.
• Finding an age-appropriate gift was a challenge… nothing is fun anymore.
• If life were a game of soccer, I would be the multi-million dollar striker and you would be the faithful water boy I wave to at the end of every big game. Wish you the best, sweet friend!
• Wrapping myself up and gifting myself to you as a birthday present would make me seem vain, so I decided to present you with my life-sized portrait instead.
• As you grow into manhood, may life bless you with children who love you just as much as you love making them!
• Life without you is like a sitcom with no laugh track. Happy birthday, my beloved buddy.
• May you age with the wisdom and strength of a Chinese kung-fu master.
• You’re a shining example of what it means to still enjoy life even when logic dictates that you’re too old to.
• In these coming years, may life bless you with so much prosperity that everything you touch turns to gold. May life also bless you with the grace to leave me, your best friend, all of your possessions once you die from starvation.
• On this great day, may God bless you with booze made of water from the fountain of youth so that you’ll never age. Have a great one.
• Happy birthday to someone good looking, super smart, charismatic, and charming. Wait… I meant from someone.” ~Funny Birthday Messages For Best Friend~
• May an extra day be added to your life for every strand of hair that falls from your head.
• Last year when I wished you old age, I didn’t know it would happen so fast! Forgive me.
• Sometimes people say I must be gay for having a best friend who is also a female, but they don’t know you the way I do.
• [insert age] is a perfect age. You’re old enough to recognize your mistakes but young enough to make some more. Happy birthday!

• Best wishes! May you grow so old that all of your best friends are replaced by robots.
• As the years progress, I learn each day to appreciate the simple things more and more, which is why we’re closer now than ever before.
• We’ve been friends for so long I can’t remember which one of us is the bad influence! Happy birthday!
• If Thanksgiving is symbolized by turkeys and Easter by rabbits, then the official animal of your birthday should be the tortoise. Happy birthday, my extremely old fart of a friend!
• Growing old is inevitable. Growing up is optional.
• It’s your birthday; eat the first and the last slice of cake just because you can!
• Look on the bright side today. This is the youngest you’ll ever be again!
• I would just like to point out that I knew today was your birthday before Facebook told me.
• You used to get so annoyed when you were carded by every bartender. Now you’ll thank them!
• I hope your day is filled with cake, dancing, and having the attention on you. You know things that normally happen. But this time, you get to do all of those things while wearing a silly party hat. Enjoy!
• I wanted to get you the cast of ‘Magic Mike’ but they were too expensive. So I’ll just call the fire department when you start cooking tonight instead.
• You’ve always been able to rock any hair color… gray included!
• You’ve heard of the three ages of man: youth, middle age, and you’re looking wonderful.
• You’re not forty; you’re eighteen with twenty-two years’ experience. 
• Birthday cards get lost and junked but a text message is forever!
• You look 22; you feel like 18; therefore, you act like your 10. Guess that makes you 50. Never change! Happy 50th 
• When we were younger, old lady stuff like crochet was cute and quirky. Soon it’s just going to be expected of us.” ~Funny Birthday Messages For Best Friend~
• Happy Birthday! Don’t forget to iron that birthday suit.
• YOU SUCK!
  …at aging. Can you at least try to look older?
• You know you’re getting older when an “all-nighter” means not getting up to pee.
• Middle age: that time when you finally get your head together – then your body falls apart.
• How do you know you’ve hit middle-age? In preparation for a big sneeze, you cross your legs really hard and hope for the best!
• You are so old, you walked into an antique shop and they sold you.
• You know you’re getting old when you can’t walk past a bathroom without thinking, “I may as well pee while I’m here.”
• You know you’re old when you turn down the lights to be economical instead of romantic.
• A little gray hair is a small price to pay for so much wisdom.
• You know you’re getting old when the little old gray-haired lady you helped across the street is your wife.
• If gray hair is a sign of wisdom, then you’re a genius!
• A wise man once said, “Forget about your past. You cannot change it.” I’d like to add: “Forget about your present. I didn’t get you one.”
• To celebrate, let’s hit up all the places we can get free dessert and birthday songs! When else can you have groups of strangers sing to you without it being awkward?
• You’re officially too old to shop at Forever 21.
• Those aren’t grey hairs, you see. They’re strands of birthday glitter growing out of your head.
• [insert age] is a perfect age. You’re old enough to recognize your mistakes but young enough to make some more. Happy Birthday!
• Don’t worry. Those aren’t gray hairs. They’re wisdom-highlights. You just happen to be extremely wise. ~Funny Birthday Messages For Best Friend~
• I wouldn’t say you’re old… you’ve just been young for longer than most of us. Happy Birthday!
• You’re not getting older… just more distinguished! Happy Birthday.
• By the time you’re [insert age], you’ve learned everything – you only have to remember it! Many happy returns on your birthday.

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